I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
Thank you for sharing Dozer with all of us and sharing the deep special love between you. Sending love and light to you both..
Dear Nagi,
I sit here with. Tears streaming down my face at the loss of Dozer. It is gut wrenching to know this beautiful dog has passed. I loved him too.
Cynthia
Love from Ohio. 💔
My deepest condolences on your loss. Dozer brought joy and laughter to many especially on days when a smile was needed. He will always stay in your heart.
Nagi, my heart felt condolence to you. You were an incredible mom to Dozer, thank you so much for sharing him with us through the years. It was a pleasure having beautiful Dozer in your posts. 🥰😘 Veronica. .
Bawling my eyes out 😭 All I really want to say, Nagi, is Rainbow 🌈 Bridge 🌉. Godspeed, Dozer 🐶
Dear Nagi, i read long ago that when a pet passes away, our grief is sometimes even stronger than our grief for a human. I can agree with that bc I lost a pup who was attached to me at the hip, literally. Everywhere I went, she was there. If she didn’t see me, she would stand at my door and look in just to make eye contact with me, then jump on the bed and lay close to me. If I left the house, she would wait in her bed all day. When I went on vacation once for a few days, I was told she would cry out for me at night. It makes me cry writing this. I cry for you too, Nagi, bc I know exactly how you’re feeling. I felt the same emotions youre having right now. You’ll be crying for a while, but one day, I promise you’ll be able to laugh, a lot. And cry at the same time, but you will be able to laugh again. And those laughs will be healing to your soul. Also the cries. And one day, you might even think about getting another pup, bc when you’re ready, your heart will yearn for it. I know for a fact God created dogs for this one reason, to teach us how to love greatly and unconditionally. I know Dozer is missing you as much as youre missing him. Grieve and mourn as long as you need to, bc he was there for you when no one else was. Through the heartaches, the pain, the laughs, the accomplishments, the book releases, the work events, and most importantly, the quiet moments. Those are the ones you’ll miss the most. But I promise, one day you will be able to smile again, Nagi. <3
Hi Nagi, I’m sorry for your loss of Doze. Just know that that you were light in his life and always will be. We love our pets unconditionally and they love us. Fill your pain fight now bur memories live forever 🥰🥰
My heart aches with yours, Nagi, and I’m praying for your peace and comfort, friend. Some days from now, when you have a quiet moment, please read this link and take comfort in the firm hope of seeing your sweet Dozer again. After all, God created your precious Dozer…
https://www.epm.org/blog/2017/Sep/22/animals-pets-heaven
So sorry for your loss. Our pets are our children.
Memories are precious.
He was a special boy.
May he rest in peace.
Stay strong and take care.
Antjie, Cape Town, South Africa 🇿🇦
What a beautiful and loving relationship you “have” with Dozer! Your life with him goes on. He’ll always be close by. Listen for him!
Nagi, although I knew it was coming I was gutted when I saw your post on Dozer’s passing. For now there are no words that will ease your saddened heart. I am so sorry for your loss.
You are a wonderful mum.
Dennette
Sending you a huge hug from Costa Rica. Dozer was really fortunate for having such a great mum. And thanks to your measureless love for him, he was the happiest dog he could ever be.
People say time heals all wounds, but I think one learns to live with the pain. ❤️💐
XOXO
RIP wonderful Dozer. You will be missed and remembered. Sending love and comfort to you Nagi. So sorry for your loss.
My heart and thoughts go out to you. There is nothing I can say to ease the pain. I am not that profound. I just want you to know that the two of you have brought me much joy over the years, and I thank you both for that. My thoughts are with you! Henri and Bubba (my doggie companion) from Kentucky
Nagi, reading that has me in tears. I remember finding your website many years ago and remember Dozer growing up always happy to sample what his mother was making. I am so glad he was always there for you when all the work you were doing felt tiring. Your brother gave you the best gift ever — a friend whose heart was all yours. I mourn your loss as I mourn those who have gone before me, knowing that someday I hope I’ll have the pleasure of meeting him in heaven while he waits to greet you. Take pleasure in knowing that he knew how much you loved him and it was a huge comfort to him. Because of your love, you shared him with us, and we thank you. Know that we won’t forget him. May the wonderful memories you have of him eventually bring you joy rather than sorrow. May God comfort you.
I’m just so so sorry Nagi..
But he is in no pain or worry now.
He knows you love love him
All sympathies
Always in your heart xx🐾🩷🐾
Dear Nagi, I am so sorry for your loss. I have admired your cooking esthetics since I discovered your blog before the pandemic. Your earnest and delicious recipes have become a small treasure I have enjoyed. It was Dozer, your wonderful Golden Retriever who added that huge tablespoon of humanity into the mix, I will miss him.
Robin
So sorry for your loss, Nagi.
Heartfealt wishes from Montreal, Canada
Helene
Dear Nagi
I feel deeply for you and know Dozer is resting peacefully watching over you now. Beautiful memories will live on in you. 💕